It's been such a long time since I last blogged.


Life's in a mess.

It's been some time since I last blogged. Latest updates:

1) Practicum.
I'm so glad the gruelling 10 weeks are over. It was really a crazy period of time... writing lesson plans everyday. But, South View was a pleasant school, so were the kids. Too bad I don't get to stay. Hopefully better things are in stor for me in BPPS.

2) Bintan trip.
Looking forward to a much-needed break. A different resort and very different people this time.

3) Exam results.
Exam results will be released on the 9th of June, together with practicum grade. Can't wait to see what I have got.

4) Convocation.
Coming up real soon as well. Somewhere in July. So, I get to graduate again (makes up for the one I missed in k2). With a diploma and without the mortarboard this time.

So, meanwhile, I've been shopping away and all things are well. Except the days I have to be back in NIE to attend lame talks and field trips. Trust NIE to spoil your holiday.

Re-featuring a Zen proverb:

"There was a man
who was so distubred
by the sight of his own shadow
and so displeased with his own footsteps
that he determined to get rid of both.

The method he hit upon was to run away from them.
So he got up and ran.

But every time he put his foot down
there was another step,while his shadow kept up with him
without the slightest difficulty.

He attributed his failure
to the fact that he was not running fast enough.
So he ran faster and faster, without stopping,
until finally he dropped dead.
He failed to realize
that if he merely stepped into the shade,
his shadow would vanish,
and if he sat down and stayed still,
there would be no more footsteps."

`Chuang-Tzu

Zen practice blocks the impulse to run away from reality. It provides us with "shade," it lets us examine the moment perfectly so we might realise that the footsteps we are running from are our own.

On to "I know why the Caged Bird Sings" now. An auto-biography, which is funny.

By the way, Miss "Booyah"... How do we get around your blog?

Exams have ended and so has the semester. Been on holidays for almost 3 weeks now. Another 3 more to go. Pretty boring really. Only thing I am looking forward to is my Bintan trip. Though it's just a 2 D 1 N trip, it definitely will break the monotony in my life.

In certain respects, the months of Nov and Dec have been pretty tumultous. Ironically, I thought I would be having fun. Always happens to me.

Sometimes you bare your soul to someone else, then you think they know everything about you or understand you completely. But, they don't seem to. You wish they would do just that little thing to make you realise that you are special or just to show that they care. But, no. I guess, it will remain a wish for now. They just seem caught up in their own cranky mood and stuck in their inertia. Blame the job. How long can you keep blaming the job? I wonder when this will change.

Having time in your hands can be scary. It gives you scary thoughts. And you keep thinking about it. You keep wondering whether you are in the right job, with the right person, with the right people. I wish I had something to do. Finished two books already. Reading, not writing. Got to look for more to read. Better think about other people's life than my own.

If there is one thing I hate now, it's school.

Men See You As: An Attainable Challenge

You know how to make your man crave more of you But you also know when to show some interest back You're good at keeping your guy guessing And over time, you'll let him know how you really feel

Do Men Find You a Challenge?